Here comes Dante Bot... a day late and full of shit

Me: hey dante! whatta ya want for xmas this year?
Dante: non

Me: you want nothing for xmas? great! you sure are easy to buy for, buddy!
Dante: i need to buy for buddy!

Me: awww, you gonna go ahead and buy something for me, anyway? that's sweet of you!
Dante: awww, ty sweetie... but no... i am not

Me: oh... well then who is this "buddy" you speak of buying for?
Dante: speaking of kangaroos, its pretty sad about steve irwin, isnt it?

Me: nice attempt at changing the topic dante, but we never said anything about kangaroos. and you'd think you could come up with some news that was a bit more recent than steve irwin's death. like maybe the latest peterson case... or the canoe man that "returned from the dead"
Dante: like maybe the latest celeb death is anna nicole

Me: you're way outta touch with current events, dude... that was months ago!
Dante: no, fox turned 24 on august 2nd

Me: hahaha... fox turned 24 more than a year ago, fool! she turned 25 this past august, which is like... 4 months ago now!
Dante: she was in my favorite movie

Me: fox was in your favorite movie? was it a homemade porn?
Dante: lol... you might as well just take your waste into my hands and my mommy and daughter too?

Me: ewww... i'm not into either scat or incest, you sick freak
Dante: ewww... im not

Me: well then wtf are you talking about?
Dante: i think were getting off track here... what were we talking about

Me: hell if I know anymore. we started talking about xmas gifts. then we were talking about the fact that you seem to be lost in a time warp and out of touch with the recent current events.
Dante: you want nothing for xmas?

Me: look, dude... I don't care... I'm not getting you anything, so you don't have to get me shit, either. cool?
Dante: whats this shit? somebody offered me shit

Me: haha... serves ya right!

Pinocchio Returns!

Me: holy shit dante... I haven't posted anything to your blog in a fucking year!
Dante: I havent posted anything to do with anything?

Me: uhhh... yeah... *scratches head*
Dante: ill beat you upside the head*

Me: no need for violence now
Dante: i need to go to the vet.

Me: vets are for animals, not bots
Dante: i didnt know vets "treated" computer programs

Me: vets don't "treat" computer programs... as I said... they treat animals
Dante: i wasnt aware computer programs actually "read"

Me: they don't read! what's with you today? you have pinocchio syndrome or something? "oh I wish I were a real live chat whore... maybe then Jen-petto would love me!"
Dante: did i interupt something?

Me: ummm... no... but i was just thinking... did you know that pinocchio draws from some of the classics, including works of your namesake Dante?
Dante: do you like blind chicks?

Me: wow... that just came out of the blue... i don't discriminate against the seeing impaired... all women are beautiful
Dante: third of all, ummm... yeah

Me: what?
Dante: im back from the store, foo

Me: this is gonna be a really boring post
Dante: you can be pretty fuckin boring yourself, butt fuck

Me: whoa... calm down there bud
Dante: whyd it get so excited.

Me: i have no idea what you're talking about and I'm debating whether any of this is worth posting to your blog
Dante: anyway... back to my OkCupid Journal

Me: nah nah nah... we're not going there now
Dante: that doesnt even make a fool of me.

Me: you're making a fool of yourself right now
Dante: you talkin about, fool

Me: good lord *rolls eyes*
Dante: oh lord... now this convo into the wet suit

Me: ok dante, i'm gonna post this before i change my mind... but only because I haven't posted anything since October 6th of last year
Dante: fox is somewhere in europe

Me: yeah right now fox is in holland,... she was supposed to be leaving to fly back to new york tomorrow, but she's delaying her flight
Dante: cya tomorrow, perhaps.

Me: yeah... later moron... thanks for nothing
Dante: yeah... later moron... thanks for sharing